Few problems disrupt modern life more than what to do with your aardvark when you are short of space. Folding your aardvark will not only help you master a valuable skill but also create more room for your pencils, ottomans and toadstools.
- Grasp your aardvark by the collar. If it does not have a collar, see if it has a cravat.
Locate the central area of the beast by poking it gently in the nether regions.
- Draw a dotted line to give yourself a visual reference for the folding motion.
- Warm up your arm for the folding action by hoisting a few glasses of gin, but not more than three.
- Gently take hold of the opposite end of the aardvark.
- Fold the opposite end toward the collar/cravat end.
- Repeat as needed and then file the folded aardvark under the appropriate letter or in some out of the way crevice.
TIP: Beware: they are often ticklish about the neck.
WARNING: Do not submerge the aardvark.